Smile..Nothing will put me down..

Been very busy with mugging for exams the past few days..Dun even have much time for myself..Study the whole nite till morning and woke up at noon everyday to go for tuition..finish tuition at about 7 and back home to study..basically tat's my routine for the past one week..luckily no more classes..

Some things happen 2 days ago..some misunderstandings and mis-interpretation of words..as i said in my previous post..went out with my bestfriend..talked about lots of things..one of which..told her about some messages sent by one of our close fren..told her tat dearie dun like it..i talked to dearie..told him tat's how tat fren of mine show his affection..he uses tat for people close to him..not only me....i know he still dun like it..but dearie understand that..i dun want to tell my fren about tis coz i dun want things to change..so diana did a favour for me..she message tat fren of mine and told him we had a fight..it wasn't a fight..not really an argument..we talked about it..tat's all..

tat fren of mine called me..said sorry for his messages..i asked diana wat he replied..diana said he'll still use those words except to me..i felt so left out..so sad..tat's why in the first place, i dun wanna say anything..i dun want it to end like this..he's my good fren..and especially after i saw some words wrote by him..i felt so sad..i dunno if he's still the same person i know back in school..

if those words were directed to me..if those words are wat he tinks i am..
then i've got nothing else to say..
i can't change the way he tinks of me anyway..
the more i say, the more he'll think i'm giving excuses..
i dunno wat i should do..
i was really hurt after i saw those words...
tears starts to roll down my cheeks..
i felt like i lost a bestfriend..

Called dearie..he was a good listening ear...thanx dear....
for being there for me when i needed someone so badly..

can't concentrate on my work tat nite..
gave up on trying to study..
slept at around 4..

even up till now..
i feel so sad..
how i wish i could turn back time..
do this another way..
so things can turn out better...
if only...

Went out with dearie last nite..felt much much better after tat...
i know i said i dun wanna meet him until after exams..
but i missed him so much..
heez..
and i so need someone right now..
after wat happened..
so when my tutee cancelled the tuition yesterday coz she was having a fever..
i called dearie and met up with him at about 6..
went for dinner and a movie..

watched the hill have eyes 2..
oh oh..
it's actually an R21 movie..
then the usher asked for my id at the entrance before i was allowed to go in..
hmm..tat's good..
coz tat means i look younger than my age..haha..

had fun yesterday..laughed alot..
thanx for making me feel better...
slept on his shoulder on the way home..
i never fall asleep when i'm with him...
usually he'll be the one sleeping..
guess i must have been very tired from all the mugging sessions..
and according to him..my head kept falling down his shoulder..
ok tat maaaybe possible..
and according to him also, i was snoring!!
tat's definitely not true..
i dun snore..never..

i'm left with 3 more days before my first paper..
or as of midnight later, i'm left with 2 more days..
aaarrrrgggghhhhh!!!!!

i still have lots to cover..
will continue to stay focus and study...

Smile...
jus concentrate on wat's important for now..
jus wait and see wat will happen next..

Nothing will put me down...
Back to Mugging Session..